From The Lighter Side

Humourous articles and classic jokes

It’s “the epic” collection of political jokes and quotes

Here is “the epic” collection of political jokes from the campaign trail. With just two weeks left in the Ontario election, By George is re-publishing its political jokes and quotes book with many more jokes and feature sections. This 150-page e-book is bursting with funny guffaws, “shaggy-dog” stories and sideways jokes about politicians and politics. The collection has some of the absolute best classics. It also has a selection of the most humourist and provocative memes culled from Facebook and Twitter. Epic Political Jokes & Quotes will put a smile on your face, one page after another. For many, it is…

Daily Affirmations for the Office

In some cultures what I do would be considered normal. I assume full responsibility for my actions, except the ones that are someone else’s fault. I no longer need to punish, deceive or compromise myself. Unless, of course, I want to stay employed. I am grateful that I am not as judgmental as all those censorious, self-righteous people around me. I need not suffer in silence while I can still moan, whimper and complain. As I learn the innermost secrets of the people around me, they reward me in many ways to keep me quiet. When someone hurts me, forgiveness…

10 comments sure to turn heads in your office

If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong. I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you. Some people cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. You’re never too old to learn something stupid. A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.  It appears your desk is a work station. Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have no imagination whatsoever. The voices in my head may not be real, but they…

Top 10 punny memes recently shared

Over the past two weeks we have had a lot of fun at By George sharing punny memes in our Facebook and Twitter streams. Here are our top 10 – and we thank all our followers who participated in our antics!!   Join us at the By George Journal on Facebook and Twitter. Enjoy our daily injections of provocative posts. Chris George, providing reliable PR counsel and effective advocacy. Need a go-to writer and experienced communicator? Call 613-983-0801 @CG&A COMMUNICATIONS.

6 more punny “shaggy dog” stories

1) The Nomads In the great desert lived a bunch of nomads. Their leader, Benny, had risen to his rank, due to his magnificent beard. His people believed a man’s strength and courage came from his beard, and thus the man with the biggest beard was their chief.   After leading the band for many years, Benny began to feel uncomfortable wearing the beards, in this hot and dusty land. He wanted to shave it off, so he called his council together to get their advice.   When he said he wanted to shave, the councilmen were shocked. One said,…

6 punny “shaggy dog” stories

1) Quasimodo After Quasimodo’s death, the bishop of the cathedral of Notre Dame sent word through the streets of Paris that a new bellringer was needed. The bishop decided that he would conduct the interviews personally and went up into the belfry to begin the screening process. After observing several applicants demonstrate their skills, he decided to call it a day when a lone, armless man approached him and announced that he was there to apply for the bellringers job. The bishop was incredulous, “You have no arms!” “No matter,” said the man, “Observe!” He then began striking the bells…

25 Funniest Puns Ever

How do you make antifreeze? Steal her blanket! eBay is so useless. I tried to look up lighters and all they had was 13,749 matches. I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest. I’ve just written a song about tortillas. Actually, it’s more of a rap. I have a few jokes about unemployed people, but it doesn’t matter; none of them work. I wasn’t originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind. It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers. I hate insects puns; they really bug me. Did…

Puns! (send us your favourite)

I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian. She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption. No matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationery. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie. Atheism…

An unemployable bloke’s lament

This punny story is found in our very own By George Treasury:   My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned . . . couldn’t concentrate.  Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn’t hack it, so they gave me the axe.  After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn’t suited for it, mainly because it was a so-so job.  Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting.  Then I tried to be a chef, figured it would add a…

3 unforgettable, very punny memes!

These past few weeks, on Facebook and Twitter, By George has been polluting our social media stream with very punny memes. Our sadistic nature has us continuing this mission through April. By way of example, here are a few of our more amusing posts this month – 3 unforgettable guffaws!   For those who have found this post via the latest By George newsletter, do you agree these are the punniest?! Was there another meme that you thought should have been selected? Send us your favourite punny memes and we will attempt to get as many posted in our Twitter feed…