In a great Inc.com article, Bill Murphey Jr. reveals “17 Verbal Habits of Highly Likeable People”
It starts with what you say–and what you know not to say. Murphey contends that how you listen to people will add (or take away from) your charisma. Here are some of the most important things highly likeable people do every day.
- They are polite when then can be — Words like “please” and “thank you” might be technically unnecessary but they’re invaluable if you want to be more charismatic.
- They acknowledge small favors — “You’re welcome.” These two short words communicate much more than “no problem” (or, of course, “yup”) when someone thanks you for something.
- They offer meaningful praise — The key word here is “meaningful.” Charismatic people give sincere compliments–never bashful, never obsequious. When someone merits praise, they say so.
- They express sincere empathy — They use phrases like, “That must have made you feel proud,” or “I can imagine you must feel angry,” thus both exploring and validating other people’s feelings. Everybody wants to be understood.
- They share useful information — Some people like to hoard information because they think it makes them more powerful. Don’t be that person.
- They offer to help — The most charismatic people among us start simply by looking for chances to help–in their families, in their communities, and in the small moments of their day-to-day lives.
- They speak with justifiable confidence — They don’t boast or brag. But when faced with challenging situations–especially things that affect other people–they’re the ones who approach the problem with an air of calmness, curiosity, and confidence.
- They use names and titles that connote respect — Charismatic people remember other people’s names, and use their titles in circumstances when it makes those people feel good.
- They express their faith in others — Four simple words: “I believe in you.”
- They remember that they’re part of a team — A sense of camaraderie makes tough situations bearable. Having a sense of humor can even make them fun.
- They make introductions — Want to know five of the nicest words anyone can ever say to two people at the same time? “I’d like you to meet….” .
- They take their turn — Likable people aren’t afraid to step up when it’s their turn to do something enjoyable, or even to bear the burden of something that isn’t so great.
- They let others make their own decisions — Truly charismatic people have confidence in their opinions–but they also recognize that other people may legitimately see things differently.
- They listen–and they want to hear more — Highly likable people are active and sincere listeners. You can tell them your opinion or a story or ask for their advice, and they respond with questions and verbal cues that suggest they’re present in the moment.
- They take responsibility — When it’s their job or their fault, they step up. They take control of the things they’re supposed to have control over.
- They voice their support — We all appreciate people who stand by us and who let us know that they’re there.
- They ask, “Why not?” — Likable people are often dreamers, optimists, and doers. RFK put it best: “There are those that look at things the way they are, and ask why? I dream of things that never were, and ask why not?”
This post comprises of excerpts from the original. Read the full article here…
Chris George, providing reliable PR counsel and effective advocacy. Need a go-to writer or experienced communicator? 613-983-0801 @CG&A COMMUNICATIONS.