{"id":1290,"date":"2020-04-03T10:06:44","date_gmt":"2020-04-03T14:06:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/?p=1290"},"modified":"2020-04-04T06:28:15","modified_gmt":"2020-04-04T10:28:15","slug":"punny-stuff","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/?p=1290","title":{"rendered":"Punny stuff"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">A man&#8217;s home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Dijon<\/span><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\"> vu &#8211; the same mustard as before.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Practice safe eating &#8211; always use condiments.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Shotgun wedding &#8211; A case of wife or death.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">A hangover is the wrath of grapes.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Reading<\/span><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\"> while sunbathing makes you well red.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">When two egotists meet, it&#8217;s an I for an I.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">A bicycle can&#8217;t stand on its own because it is two tired.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Acupuncture is a jab well done.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">What&#8217;s the definition of a will? (It&#8217;s a dead give away.)<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">If you don&#8217;t pay your exorcist, you get repossessed<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">You feel stuck with your debt if you can&#8217;t budge it.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Local Area Network in Australia &#8211; the LAN down under.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Every calendar&#8217;s days are numbered.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">A lot of money is tainted &#8211; Taint yours and taint mine.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">He had a photographic memory that was never developed.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Once you&#8217;ve seen one shopping center, you&#8217;ve seen a mall.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Santa&#8217;s helpers are subordinate clauses.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li>\n<div class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\">Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.<\/span><\/div>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-family: Georgia; font-size: 11pt;\"><em>Admittedly, at<\/em> By George<em>, we are huge fans of punny material. So, we wish to convey are appreciation to our friend Dick Inwood of Ottawa, who recently sent us several e-mails with streams of puns and turn-of-phrases. Thanks Dick!<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<p class=\"MsoNormal\" style=\"margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;\"><em>Chris George provides reliable PR &amp; GR counsel and effective advocacy. Need a go-to writer and experienced communicator? Call 613-983-0801 @<\/em>\u00a0<a href=\"http:\/\/cgacommunications.com\/m\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">CG&amp;A COMMUNICATIONS<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A man&#8217;s home is his castle, in a manor of speaking. Dijon vu &#8211; the same mustard as before. Practice safe eating &#8211; always use condiments. Shotgun wedding &#8211; A case of wife or death. A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy. A hangover is the wrath of grapes. Dancing cheek-to-cheek is&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12],"tags":[40],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1290"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1290"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1290\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11250,"href":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1290\/revisions\/11250"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1290"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1290"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bygeorgejournal.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1290"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}