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The accident has taken an edge off this fun. It\u2019s just become another thing to think about.
\nThese days I carry my knee like some foreign appendage
\nwincing and praying to myself that it doesn\u2019t explode
\nThere\u2019s that sharp, stabbing in my left knee that reminds me of my vulnerabilities
\nYet, thankfully, I can bike through the pain (still) to climb the next hill
\nand, take the crest, shift my weight, relax, coast, exhale.<\/p>\n
What had I expected with this climb?
\nI had felt that jolt as I raised myself from my seat and then I checked
\nthe cantaloupe appeared overtop my knee, my tendon as hard as the Rock of Gilbraltor
\nThe only consolation is the thought that I will not falter, but continue to ride through\u2026
\nThe wind and the hills and that sharp stabbing pain of my leg
\nall these certainties that make this ride so important \u2013 and I can\u2019t help by grin<\/p>\n
I check ahead and prepare for the next climb, gearing down
\nto enter the climb, slow but steady
\nright, right, right, I pump through
\nThe right leg extended \u2013 ignoring my left knee
\nThere is a drop of sweat rolled down onto my nose.
\nThe strain is obviously good for my soul, no?
\nHonest effort to wash away all the worthless self-inspections
\nI dig in, shift in the saddle to take weight off my leg<\/p>\n
My mind wonders\u2026. biking is therapeutic \u2013
\nalong with exercise there is reflection and self-inquiry
\nOn one level a biker will see the roadside and take in its wonders
\nStretches of trail with ever changing horizons
\nThen on another level, he is dragged through daily encounters, cascading memories and irritants, just to reaffirm a doubtful significance
\nIt\u2019s a mix of physical and mental exercises,
\nstarting with a few easy stretches \u2013 pulling back and then pushing forward
\nto retread ground that just yesterday you had visited
\nIt\u2019s a continual peeling back of thoughts and ideas and reality
\nunderneath the helmet \u2013
\nRide after ride, routinely humping your way through the same mental landscape,
\nannoyed with the inability to produce closure to the nonsense you\u2019ve chosen to recall<\/p>\n
Before me is what I have come to know
\nas my favourite countryside vista
\nWhy does it look so unattractive today?
\nIt seems on days like these
\nall I do is complain<\/p>\n
How\u2019s it that wind can blow two directions at once?
\nI am pumping hard and my head is down
\nLeaning against strong, steady gusts of wind
\nThat same wind that greeted me when I was peddling in the opposite direction<\/p>\n
Loose gravel gives way to a washboard surface
\nAnd I\u2019m uncomfortably bouncing in the saddle
\nNow, what did I do to deserve this?
\nSuddenly from out of the curve a car appears
\nThe tires spit up dirt and two stones
\nIt passes, leaving dust and the smell of exhaust to envelop me
\nI ask again, what did I do\u2026.<\/p>\n
I know I must fixate on something else: crows
\nThe crows caw at me with amusement, no encouragement,
\njust an annoying call of delight as they watch me climb the twisting hill,
\nhead turned and shifting back and forth in the saddle.
\nThey seem to herald me to continue around the bend
\nto more road and another hill.
\nI relax my left leg and glide through the decline,
\npraying all the time to be able to survive that next ascent.
\nAll the while, crows fly along beside the road, just above the brush,
\nso that they can keep an eye on my ride.<\/p>\n
I now see the finches dart in and around the cat tails
\nand coming ever so close to where I can only dream of being
\nThey seem stuck in a pattern of full circles,
\nrepeatedly diving as close to the ground, then turning suddenly;
\nthey glide sideways above the dirt as they have done so many times before.
\nAnd just as my legs go full circle, my knee turns over,
\nand then I see that I have sprouted finch wings.
\nI am out of the saddle and lean to continue my own turn downward spiral
\nand pick up speed to feel that rush again, take in the full breath and hold the moment;
\nnot to let it escape as it had when I was younger and not smart enough to feel anything.
\nIt\u2019s a complete moment. It\u2019s absolutely why I carry my knee out to bike these hills.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
– Chris George<\/em><\/p>\n (ed. – This poem is from the collection entitled<\/em> Midstep – a dozen poems towards where I want to be.<\/strong> The collection can be obtained without cost by contacting myself at chrisg.george@gmail.com )<\/em><\/p>\n To see more on cycling, pedal through this By George Journal<\/em> menu<\/a>.<\/p>\n