Three Contractors and the Fence

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence on Parliament Hill. One is from Ottawa, another is from Toronto, and the third is from Montreal. All three go with a government official to examine the fence.

The Ottawa contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. “Well,” he said, “I figure the job will run about $900 ($400 for materials, $400 for my crew, and $100 profit for me).”

The Toronto contractor also did some measuring and figuring, then said, “I can do this job for $700 ($300 for materials, $300 for my crew, and $100 profit for me).”

The Montreal contractor didn’t measure or figure, but leaned over to the government official and whispered, “$2,700.”

The official, incredulous, said, “You didn’t even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?”

The Montreal contractor whispered back, “$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we hire the guy from Toronto to fix the fence.”

“Done!” replied the government official.  

And that is how our government procurement works.

 

FROM OUR E-BOOK

The joke was selected from Epic Political Jokes & Quotes – the 150-page-plus e-book bursting with funny guffaws, “shaggy-dog” stories and sideways jokes about politicians and politics. Read more about it here. Order your copy here.

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