Rats

A tourist walked into a curio shop in Toronto. Looking around at the exotica, he noticed a very life-like, life-sized bronze statue of a rat. It had no price tag, but was so striking he decided he must have it.  He took it to the owner: “How much for the bronze rat?” “Twelve dollars for…

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Pet Parrot

During a lull between speeches at the recent Liberal convention, Sophie Grégeiore-Trudeau leaned over to chat with the PMs Chief of Staff Gerald Butts. “You know, I bought Justin a parrot for Christmas. That bird is so smart, Justin has already taught him to pronounce over two hundred words!”  “Wow, that’s pretty impressive,” said Butts,…

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Heart Attack

An elderly man suffered a massive heart attack. The family drove wildly to get him to the emergency room. After what seemed like a very long wait, the ER doctor appeared wearing his scrubs and a long face. “Sadly,” he said, “I’m afraid Grandpa is brain-dead, but his heart is still beating.” “Oh, Dear God!”…

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The Haircut

When campaigning along the streets of Toronto, Justin Trudeau ducked into a barber shop and asked the barber, “How long will this take, how much will it cost, and how good will the haircut look?” The barber replied, “Just ten minutes, cost $20, and look marvelous.” An hour and fifteen minutes later Trudeau looked into…

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