These insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to four-letter words. When writers and speakers pondered upon words and weighed each of them before making a sentence.
- He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire. – Winston Churchill
- I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure. – Clarence Darrow
- Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it. – Moses Hadas
- I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it. – Mark Twain
- He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends. – Oscar Wilde
- I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here. – Stephen Bishop
- He is a self-made man and worships his creator. – John Bright
- I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial. – Irvin S. Cobb
- He’s not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others. – Samuel Johnson
- He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up. – Paul Keating
- In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily. – Charles, Count Talleyrand
- He loves nature in spite of what it did to him. – Forrest Tucker
- Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it? – Mark Twain
- His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork. – Mae West
- Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go. – Oscar Wilde
- He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts … For support rather than illumination. – Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
- I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it. – Groucho Marx
- There’s nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won’t cure. – Jack E. Leonard
- He has the attention span of a lightning bolt. – Robert Redford
- They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge. – Thomas Brackett Reed
- He has Van Gogh’s ear for music. – Billy Wilder
- He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know. – Abraham Lincoln
- He’s a modest little person, with much to be modest about. – Winston Churchill
- I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend … if you have one. – George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill. Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second … if there is one. – Winston Churchill (in response)
- The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: She said, “If you were my husband, I’d give you poison.” He said, “If you were my wife, I’d drink it.”
- A Member of Parliament to Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.” “That depends, Sir,” said Disraeli, “whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”
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