CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD: Leaps tall building in a single bound; is more powerful than a locomotive; is faster than a speeding bullet; walks on water; discusses policy with God.
PRESIDENT: Leaps short buildings in a single bound; is more powerful than a switch engine; is just as fast as a speeding bullet; walks on water if the sea is calm; talks with God.
EXECUTIVE VICE PRESIDENT: Leaps short buildings with a running start and favorable winds; is almost as powerful as a switch engine; is faster than a speeding BB; walks on water in an indoor swimming pool; talks with God if special request is approved.
VICE PRESIDENT: Barely clears a Quonset hut; loses tug-of-war with a locomotive; can fire a speeding bullet; swims well; is occasionally addressed by God.
GENERAL MANAGER: Makes high marks on the wall when trying to leap buildings; is run over by locomotive; can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury; dog paddles; talks to animals.
MANAGER: Runs into buildings; recognizes locomotive two out of three times; is not issued ammunition; can’t stay afloat with a life preserver; talks to walls.
TRAINEE: Falls over doorsteps when trying to enter building; says “look at the choo-choo”; wets him/herself with a water pistol; plays in mud puddles; mumbles to him/herself.
SECRETARY: Lifts buildings and walks under them; kicks locomotives off the tracks; catches speeding bullets in his/her teeth; freezes water with a single glance; is God.
Chris George provides reliable PR & GR counsel and effective advocacy. Need a go-to writer and experienced communicator? Call 613-983-0801 @ CG&A COMMUNICATIONS.
