An unemployable bloke’s lament

This punny story is found in our very own By George Treasury:

My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned . . . couldn’t concentrate.  Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn’t hack it, so they gave me the axe.  After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn’t suited for it, mainly because it was a so-so job.  Next I tried working in a muffler factory but that was too exhausting.  Then I tried to be a chef, figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just didn’t have the thyme.  I attempted to be a deli worker, but anyway I sliced it, I couldn’t cut the mustard.

My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found I wasn’t noteworthy.  I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I didn’t have any patience.  Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I just didn’t fit in.  I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I couldn’t live on my net income.  I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was just too draining.  So then I got a job in a workout center, but they said I wasn’t fit for the job.

After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as an historian, until I realized there was no future in it.  My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it was always the same old grind.  So, I recently retired and I found I’m perfect for the job!

Chris George, providing reliable PR counsel and effective advocacy. Need a go-to writer and experienced communicator? Call 613-983-0801 @ CG&A COMMUNICATIONS.



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